What Can I Do To Defuse My Anger?

Anger management methods help you disperse and manage your anger after it arises and may otherwise cause you to act dangerously or rashly. There are many different techniques that are available.

There are some that have the goal to help you stop and think about things before you take any action.

Some have the aim of using and dispersing the rush of adrenaline that comes with anger.

Some anger management techniques work for people of every age, while others are specifically aimed at children and young adults.

Different techniques will be more effective for different people.


When you count it gives you the chance to cool down. That allows you to think more clearly and allow you to avoid acting on your initial impulse. At times, for example, you are a soldier – you are trained to act without having to first think. There may not be any time to think when your life is at great risk. However, civilians normally have enough time to think, and if you think before you react, in most cases you will get a better result.

Breathe slowly

Take slow, even breaths. Exhale for a longer period of time than you inhale. Relax while you are breathing out. You breathe in more automatically when out when you are angry. The key is breathing out more than you do in to help you calm down.

Anger can sometimes result in hyperventilation. That is the exact opposite of what calm breathing is. When you hyperventilate, it means you are breathing too much and too deeply. This results in you feeling increasingly unwell and anxious. To learn more about hyperventilation, see the leaflet entitled Dealing with Breathing Problems.

Attend classes that will teach you techniques such as meditation and yoga to help you be able to use breathing techniques in order to calm down.


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Time out

Having some quiet time can help you better prepare to look for solutions. For example, if you are arguing with someone, you might start to feel angry. You might want to recommend to the person you are arguing with that you take a five-minute time out and may drink a cup of tea or glass of water and then have a talk.

During your time out, take a step from your situation. Are you arguing over something important or is it a trivial matter? If the two of you are totally opposite sides is there any middle ground that you both can accept?

Are you wanting to stay angry with the individual? If not, then be prepared to inform them that you don’t want to feel angry and are interested in finding a solution if they want to also. You don’t have to give in – you might still need to agree to disagree, but without being angry about it.


Your body s full of adrenaline whenever you are angry. You can help disperse this by engaging in physical activity. It will help to reduce your stress that can result in you becoming angry.

If you feel anger building up, go for a swim, a run or take a brisk walk. Maybe the individual are you feeling angry with can do the same thing.

If you are in the middle of an argument, think about taking a time out and go on a short run or walk.

In general, increase your levels of exercise on a regular basis is going to help defuse the adrenaline inside your body that keeps you feeling angry and over the long run can help you feel less angry. Many successful athletes claim they started participating in sports as teenagers to help channel their anger.